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Split parenting

User-anonymous
Posted by: Anonymous
Flag
Wed 25, Jan 2017 at 8:45pm
Categories:
After Separation

My husband and I have just separated, we have 2 boys together. We are trying our best to be amicable and keep things friendly so we can move forward and keep things positive and stable for the boys. My ex has just told me he would like to do split parenting i.e. he has them one week and I have them the other. I have said I am not comfortable with this as they are too young and its too long for them not to see the other parent. It is very difficult with work commitments to arrange a good balance, does anyone have any advise on split parenting please?

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Comments

  • Pc jaybee (moderator) Flag

    I'm sorry to hear about your separation but glad to know that you and your husband understand the importance of working together to sort things out. It's a lot to do by yourselves so don't be afraid to look for help if you feel you need it by using a mediation service (there should be one in your area).
    Meanwhile, there are a number of articles on this site on this topic. Here's one that might be helpful:
    http://theparentconnection.org.uk/articles/sharing-mum-and-dad-issues-surrounding-shared-parenting
    and if you type 'co-parenting' into the search box you'll find several other items.
    Shared, or 'split' parenting doesn't necessarily mean children spending equal amounts of time with each parent. I think to a certain extent it depends on their age as to how they cope with moving between 2 homes. It sounds like your children are still quite young. How old are they?

    Fri 27, Jan 2017 at 11:55am
  • User-anonymous January17 Flag

    They are only 4 and 7 which I feel is too young for a 7/7 split. I am happy to work with a shared parenting agreement but I want to keep stability for the children and routine as I feel this will help them through this difficult time. I live next to the school they both go to and have always done the running around for them, I have adjusted my job and hours to fit with school and the children and don't want them to start living out of a suitcase.

    Fri 27, Jan 2017 at 12:37pm
  • Pc jaybee (moderator) Flag

    If you haven't already, you might want to consider mediation if you and your husband are going to find this difficult to negotiate without some help.

    http://theparentconnection.org.uk/articles/why-mediation-is-becoming-the-go-to-service-for-separating-parents

    Tue 31, Jan 2017 at 9:06am