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What happens next ?

Posted by: Anonymous
Mon 29, Jan 2018 at 10:58pm
Separating , After Separation

My son is 14 , and I am splitting up with his mum , we are selling the house ,and going are separate ways , he had told his mum he wants 50/50 one week with her and one week with me , is this possible and what process do we need to do ??

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  • Pc jaybee (moderator) Flag

    Sorry to hear that you and your partner are separating.
    I imagine it's a difficult time for all of you.
    Most couples (about 90%) reach agreement between themselves arrangements for their children without involving lawyers or the court. If this is an arrangement that you all agree is the best one for your son, then there's no need to involve anyone else.
    What does his mum say?

    Tue 30, Jan 2018 at 9:12am
  • User-anonymous Mikewarrendene Flag

    She wants him to stay there , but he had told her that he wants 50/50 , can she stop him at 14 , doing this after separation ?

    Tue 30, Jan 2018 at 9:54am
  • Pc jaybee (moderator) Flag

    I'm guessing you know as well as anybody how easy or difficult it might be persuade your son to do something he doesn't want to, especially now he's 14!
    It may seem to him that '50/50' is the best thing to do to be fair to both of you. (Which is often the what kids want to try and do).
    It's early days yet, none of you really know what will work best; you may all have to be open to trying things out and being flexible. The worst thing would be if your son feels any more torn between you than he may already. He loves both of you so the amount of time he spends with either you or his mum is not a measure of how much he loves each of you.

    Sat 3, Feb 2018 at 2:06pm
  • User-anonymous Mikewarrendene Flag

    He knows what he wants and as told her he wants one week there and one with me , can she stop him ? Or go against his wishes . Regards

    Mon 5, Feb 2018 at 3:44pm
  • Pc jaybee (moderator) Flag

    It depends a bit on how prepared your son is to assert himself to his Mum and do what he has said he wants to do. What steps might she take to stop him, do you think?

    Tue 6, Feb 2018 at 9:00am